fics by Erin Ptah

Title: Expecting, Chapter 20: Boy, "George"
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~4300
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: I was almost tempted to write, in the middle of this chapter, "...50,000! I've hit 50,000! Take that, Hyperion! I bet you thought I'd never finish! Now pay up!"

I didn't, of course. I'm not that cruel.

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( Meetings and reunions, decisions, revelations, confessions, and very possibly a few happy endings. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 18: Leader of the Nation
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~4600
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: More information on the vetoed stem cell bill can be found on NYTimes.com (requires free registration), on ScienceDaily.com, and in the Library of Congress legislative record.

Clips referenced: A little respect; Vice President of the Nation.

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( For Stephen, getting an invitation to appear with the President is a dream come true; to make it happen, he'll surpass all expectations. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 16: In Jon We Trust
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: More of the offscreen tumbling; real wife action
Words: ~3200
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Okay, so it wasn't actually Jon's wife in that first clip on TDS; it was production assistant Gina Brown. But let's pretend.

Clips referenced: Jon and his wife watch TV; Pellicano voicemails (NFZ has transcripts).

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( Jon's wife appears on the show and gets brought fully up-to-date; some shady business in Stephen's past comes to light. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 14: Jolly Good Show
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for offstage, um, "tumbling"
Words: ~1900
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Clips referenced: The Queen's visit; Tony Blair's departure.

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( John Oliver accidentally puts himself in the line of fire, and Jon retaliates; the other correspondents are horrified to find how far he'll go. Mmm, drama. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 12: You've Got To Kick A Little
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~1900
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: I'm always up for concrit. This chapter in particular benefited greatly from a comment by gaiafaye on the last one.

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( Stephen and Jon are still adjusting to their new post-fight dynamic. Jon, meanwhile, is starting to notice what other people think of it. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 10: The Doctor Is In
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Warnings: Mild swearing, mild ickiness
Words: ~3900
( Three this time! )

Notes: Dr. Moreau's granddaughter is named after her. If you ever watched The Magic School Bus, you've seen her in action. (This has no bearing on the story; it's just amusing.)

Clips referenced: House-buying advice; Lent. The short referenced in the Moment of Zen can be found here.

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( A routine checkup turns into a bit of a confessional, and Dr. Moreau finally makes her Daily Show debut. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 8: Fortune Favors The Ballsy
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G for this part
Words: ~1700
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: In the Reportverse, Stephen and Jon have radically different ideologies, so Stewart-Colbert '08 (or, for that matter, Colbert-Stewart '08) is not a popular T-shirt.

Clips referenced: Tragic local story; eight-child policy.

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( If it isn't one thing, it's another. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 6: The Sins Of The Papa
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13 for this part
Warnings: Language, sensuality, Bill O'Reilly
Words: ~2300
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: For the purposes of this fic, Stephen was O'Reilly's guest on Friday (the 19th) rather than Thursday (the 18th, also when Bill appeared on the Report).

Clips referenced: Bill O; Stephen's past 'professional' names; the aftermath.

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( A story breaks about the biological parents of Stephen's child. Then, Stephen has a historic meeting of the minds (or rather, meeting of the balls) with a parental figure of his own. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 4: The Hopes And Fears Of All The Years
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Warnings: Lots of alcohol.
Words: ~2000
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: As Stephen's pregnancy began in October, the story has now hit December. Put on some carols, break out the red-and-green napkins that gather dust in your cupboard eleven months of the year, and get into the holiday Christmas spirit. (Alternatively, you could pull out the RENT soundtrack; the musical takes place largely on Christmas Eve, and it's where I got Joanne, who makes a brief cameo here.)

Clips referenced: The all-star guitar-off; helium balloon drop.

Stephen's wife's name was given as Lorraine here. Her maiden name is taken from the actor's wife.

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( The Decemberists showdown culminates in a jam so triumphant that things can only go downhill from there — and they do. )

Title: Expecting, Chapter 2: Midterm, Midtacular
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Warnings: Language, mild ickiness.
Words: ~1700
( Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: A couple of things to remember about the Reportverse (the one in which Stephen is a real egomaniac and TDS is a real news show):

All the shows are live, rather than being taped earlier in the day. This pretense can be seen in the real shows; for instance, in the 6/6/06 episode, Jon opens with "in less than an hour we will have averted the apocalypse."

Clips referenced: Midterm Midtacular toss, ending.

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( In the early weeks of the pregnancy, the people around Stephen try to adjust, while dealing with the chaos of the midterm elections. )