Two drabbles: fake news, Strangers With Candy

[ptahrrific]

Title: The Gospel of Jesus Comes To Flatpoint
Series: Strangers With Candy
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Sexytalk; a couple of bad words.
Disclaimer: Fiction. Characters are not mine. Used without permission.

A drabble. Does exactly what it says on the tin.

(Title refers to the shared universe, more of which is found in fakenews_fanfic, which started from the line 'The only way straight people could be threatened by same-sex marriage would be if it were mandatory.')

The Gospel of Jesus Comes To Flatpoint

The Friday lunch poker game is usually reserved for complaining about Jerri Blank, but today there’s only one thing on anyone’s mind.

"It’s an infringement of our basic civil liberties," fumes Wolf as she deals.

"That’s right!" booms Blackman from beside her. "And the things they’re making us do! Disgusting! As if we’re a bunch of homos!"

The sentiments are echoed around the table until the last man. "Well, Noblet?" demands Blackman. "Don’t you object to this scandalous law?"

Chuck, who has been wearing the same shit-eating grin since the amendment was passed, beams. "Why should I care? I’m married."

—

Title: Laissez Les Bons Temps Rouler
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Sexytalk; a couple of bad words.
Disclaimer: Same as above. Also, parody.

Another drabble. The aftermath of Stephen's 'trip' to New Orleans.

Laissez Les Bons Temps Rouler

“Don’t be ridiculous, Jon! It’s all part of the N’Awlins atmosphere. We get drunk, you flash me, I give you beads. And, yes, I know that technically these are the kind of beads designed to be stuck in your ass, not worn around your neck, but that just makes it that much more important to get all the other details right. It was not meant to be a commentary on your weight, and I don’t know why you have to get so sensitive just because you’re starting to develop man-boobs. Now stop whining, take your top off, and shake ‘em.”

Comments

[rehime.livejournal.com]

Chuck can finally live in peace, at the expense of many other people. That man's life is cursed.

I can just imagine Jon during Stephen's dialogue, covering his chest and then quickly putting them down, because it's not like he's a girl or anything.

[ptahrrific]

At least Chuck is happy in one 'verse. Unlike, say, our poor maligned Jon =3

Thanks for reading!

[gaiafaye.livejournal.com]

Wait, isn't the 28th Amendmentverse the one where homosexuality (and anything else not in accordance with God's Law) is outlawed? I know what 'verse you mean though.

Both of these made me laugh. I love the twist on Chuck's old line in the first one. And "Stephen" is tactful as usual.

[ptahrrific]

I thought it was the one where heterosexuality was found to be not in accordance with God's Law, and summarily banned. Of course, I could be wrong. It's late.

Glad these amused!

[gaiafaye.livejournal.com]

It's possible they both utilize a 28th Amendment. This is the one I'm referring to, at any rate.

[ptahrrific]

...yeah, that's not the one I'm thinking of. Have tweaked the header, will not worry about it too much.

[canadian-plant.livejournal.com]

Oh, Chuck. That's sweet in some ways (he's actually happy) but pretty depressing in others (a lot of other people have to be really upset).

The second one, I should point out, is pure lulz. Shake 'em, Jon!

[ptahrrific]

That whole 'verse is so depressing that I'm glad at least one person in it is happy.

Hee. Thanks!

[punkishgrin.livejournal.com]

Un-repressed!Chuck is love! I wonder if they acted out a fantasy for their "proof night".

Hee, let the good times roll! Oh, Stephen, that is so...so wrong. Both Jon and I feel violated X)

[ptahrrific]

I bet their proof night is epic.

Jon will get over it. You, on the other hand, may carry the scars for the rest of your days. (Muahahahaha.)

Thank you!

[punkishgrin.livejournal.com]

Epic, you say? Ugh, no! Now I'm forced to think of movies about magical round objects and the blunt objects that fit into them. Whaddiyme sposed to do with all these scars, huh?!

I would like to see Geoffrey with a pair of Elf ears though... ^_^

[wishflower4.livejournal.com]

Hehe...

That's wonderful...the first one was great, but the second one made my roommates look at me funny when I cracked up.

[ptahrrific]

Roommates not it-getters? Aww.

Thanks!

[tds-tcr-love.livejournal.com]

Haha! Both are really are great but the second one made me sporfle soooo hard. I heard Stephen's drawl as he said 'N'Awlins'. Which now makes me want to watch that segment again.

*scurries away*

[ptahrrific]

Can't go wrong with Stephen and drawling =3

Thanks!

[gammaguilt.livejournal.com]

a beautiful snippet of SWC! making Noblet happy (or happier) is something I've always wanted to try, if I ever wrote something!

[ptahrrific]

Go for it sometime - the world could use more happy!Chuck. And thanks!

[deepad]

The second one was hilarious! Poor Jon.