Erin Ptah (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ptahrrific) wrote2007-04-08 10:50 pm
ptahrrific) wrote2007-04-08 10:50 pm
Entry tags:
Fake News: The Sentence of Mr. Castagana
Title: The Sentence of Mr. Castagana
Fandom: The Daily Show
Genre: Comedy, revenge
Rating: PG
Words: ~300
Disclaimer: Any similarity between the fictional version of the person portrayed here and the actual persons is purely coincidental. This is a work of fiction. This is not an attempt to defame the character of said person on the basis of libel, as the work is FICTIONAL.
Notes: On December 2, 2006, a man named Chad Conrad Castagana was indicted for sending threatening letters containing an unknown white powder to several politicians and celebrities, including Jon Stewart.
An unrelated item: America (The Book) contains a pull-out chart detailing the organization of the Shadow Government.
The Sentence of Mr. Castagana
The knock was polite and businesslike, and Chad opened the door with no idea what was about to happen. A quartet of stern-looking people in black suits and dark glasses stood on his front step.
"Can I help you?"
"Mr. Castagana?" said the woman in front. "Friend of Katherine Harris, conservative voter, not a fan of Alan Berg?"
"What do you want?" asked Chad warily.
"You are hereby sentenced for threat of assault on Jon Stewart."
Chad started. "Sentenced? You can't do that! I know my rights! I need to be arrested, charged, given a trial--"
"I don't think you understand, Mr. Castagana," said the woman, tipping her glasses down to look him in the eyes. "Those come with official police action. We are not the official police."
Then Chad noticed. Her earrings. A lapel pin on one of the man. The cufflinks on all four of them.
Pink triangles.
He backed up in a rush, trying to shut them out - but the woman grabbed the door with an iron grip, holding it open, and then all four walked in. The last man in calmly closed the door.
"This poor thing needs a new finish," he remarked offhandedly. "And the whole place could use some new trim, to unify the color scheme..."
"Now now, Vinny," said the woman. "We're on business."
"Right. Sorry."
She looked back at Chad, and cracked her knuckles with a sound that was uncomfortably like bones snapping.
"Mr. Stewart doesn't realize it, but he looks out for us," she explained. "And now, we're going to return the favor."
Fandom: The Daily Show
Genre: Comedy, revenge
Rating: PG
Words: ~300
Disclaimer: Any similarity between the fictional version of the person portrayed here and the actual persons is purely coincidental. This is a work of fiction. This is not an attempt to defame the character of said person on the basis of libel, as the work is FICTIONAL.
Notes: On December 2, 2006, a man named Chad Conrad Castagana was indicted for sending threatening letters containing an unknown white powder to several politicians and celebrities, including Jon Stewart.
An unrelated item: America (The Book) contains a pull-out chart detailing the organization of the Shadow Government.
The Sentence of Mr. Castagana
The knock was polite and businesslike, and Chad opened the door with no idea what was about to happen. A quartet of stern-looking people in black suits and dark glasses stood on his front step.
"Can I help you?"
"Mr. Castagana?" said the woman in front. "Friend of Katherine Harris, conservative voter, not a fan of Alan Berg?"
"What do you want?" asked Chad warily.
"You are hereby sentenced for threat of assault on Jon Stewart."
Chad started. "Sentenced? You can't do that! I know my rights! I need to be arrested, charged, given a trial--"
"I don't think you understand, Mr. Castagana," said the woman, tipping her glasses down to look him in the eyes. "Those come with official police action. We are not the official police."
Then Chad noticed. Her earrings. A lapel pin on one of the man. The cufflinks on all four of them.
Pink triangles.
He backed up in a rush, trying to shut them out - but the woman grabbed the door with an iron grip, holding it open, and then all four walked in. The last man in calmly closed the door.
"This poor thing needs a new finish," he remarked offhandedly. "And the whole place could use some new trim, to unify the color scheme..."
"Now now, Vinny," said the woman. "We're on business."
"Right. Sorry."
She looked back at Chad, and cracked her knuckles with a sound that was uncomfortably like bones snapping.
"Mr. Stewart doesn't realize it, but he looks out for us," she explained. "And now, we're going to return the favor."