ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Erin Ptah ([personal profile] ptahrrific) wrote2009-03-25 05:31 pm

Fake News: The WØRD - Jon Stewartized

Title: The WØRD - December 29, 2006: Jon Stewartized
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: It ain't my fake news show; I just fake write for it.

Done for the Colboard Report, the fan-produced series of segments that helped TCR addicts on the old Colbert Nation forum make it through a long cold show-free vacation.
___

The communications strategy firm Foghound just released its second annual list of trends that it predicts are going to be all the rage next year, which brings us to tonight's WØRD:



Jon Stewartized.

One of the ten trends that Foghound has identified for 2007 is the increased "Jon Stewartizing" of marketing and public relations. And you know Foghound is good at identifying trends, because they graded their own trend list from last year and gave themselves a B average.



You've probably seen Jon Stewart. If you've ever gotten to your television in the evening only to find that the Report isn't on yet - which you should do every night, rather than risk missing a single second of me - then the short guy you on your screen is Jon.

In fact, a lot of my staff used to work on his show before mine started.



So when I first saw this news, I was a little confused. What does "Jon Stewartizing" mean? Does it mean that companies will increasingly discover young, bright, right-thinking men of action, give them the television shows that they have so long been due...



...and then fade into obscurity as the new rising stars take off?

Probably not. As you may have guessed, this isn't a pattern that could be sustained for very long. I mean, can you imagine more than one Stephen Colbert? It just wouldn't last!



Obviously Foghound's prediction must mean something else. So I took a closer look at the article. And as far as I can tell, all it's trying to say is that marketing will use more comedy.

Nation, this is ridiculous. Last time I checked, Jon Stewart was not the only comedian in the world. In fact, comedy seems to be involved in every show on this channel.



Now, clearly, my show involves hard news, but you might have noticed that I like to bring a little levity to the table occasionally. In fact, I'm so good at it that sometimes my audiences laugh when I haven't even given them a punch line!



So even though I've already made linguistic history with 'truthiness', there's no reason I shouldn't be able to get in on this one. From now on, I want every member of the Colbert Nation to refer to adding comedy - as well as bringing the truth, using democracy, and exhibiting balls - as "Stephen Colbertizing." Insist that your friends and relatives do the same thing. Be obnoxious if you have to - just get this phrase into common usage!



After all, if a minority of very vocal citizens with extreme viewpoints can't force the world to bend to their will, what's the alternative? A world where people have to get informed, have serious discussions, respect each other's views, and approach everything with moderation? What kind of world would that be?



And that's the WØRD. We'll be right back.

[identity profile] anais-rhys.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 04:42 am (UTC)(link)
His tie is bright cool blue, just like Hon's eyes *_* /end starry eyed geek girl admiration.

[identity profile] anais-rhys.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
that would be JON's eyes (posting from my iPhone without an account that lets me edit = fail)
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[identity profile] stellar-dust.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 04:48 am (UTC)(link)
Ok, these are brilliant.

You need to be a writer for the report. :D

[identity profile] rehime.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 04:48 am (UTC)(link)
I'm really loving these. What a great week to post them!
sarcasticsra: A picture of a rat snuggling a teeny teddy bear. (Default)

[personal profile] sarcasticsra 2009-03-25 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
A world where people have to get informed, have serious discussions, respect each other's views, and approach everything with moderation? What kind of world would that be?

Ahhh, so perfect.

Seconding the brilliant description.

P.S. I know my birthday is awesome, but is there another reason both this and the last one were for Dec. 28th? =P
ext_14783: girl underwater (Default)

[identity profile] lavinialavender.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 06:38 am (UTC)(link)
That final punchline is beautiful. :) Makes me so happy.

[identity profile] rehime.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 06:59 am (UTC)(link)
Hi -- do you mind if I used that icon? I will give credit to the original maker, the username angeleyesjg24?
ext_14783: girl underwater (Default)

[identity profile] lavinialavender.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 07:02 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, go ahead! You don't need to ask my permission. :) The important thing is to credit.

[identity profile] innocentsmith.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 06:41 am (UTC)(link)
These are utterly awesome. Wow.

[identity profile] rissaofthesaiya.livejournal.com 2009-03-25 05:27 pm (UTC)(link)
This is epic.
shoebox_addict: (Default)

[personal profile] shoebox_addict 2009-03-26 11:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, this was the best one!! You captured his voice perfectly here and the bullets just cracked me up. Well done!

[identity profile] slyreflection.livejournal.com 2009-03-27 02:38 am (UTC)(link)
You and the Word = FTW.

I love it. :D
themistoklis: Janice Rand (Default)

[personal profile] themistoklis 2009-03-27 02:48 pm (UTC)(link)
This... this is pretty much the best thing ever. I wish this had actually happened. Everything came together to make the last one absolutely perfect.

[identity profile] silkyjumbo.livejournal.com 2009-03-28 12:26 am (UTC)(link)
or lose them to "the office"

this made me laugh loudly and scare my dog.

brilliant.