Words fail me at how great this is--you're doing such a wonderful job at fleshing out the concept. Your characters are faceted and interesting and I'm already emotionally invested in both Stephen/Jon pairs. I can't wait for more!
Favorite bits;
"The silence was total. Even the crickets outside stopped chirping." "Oh, God, please don't fire me." "Please don't hate me," whispered Stephen, but by then Jon was too far gone to hear. (you make me really care for "Stephen"--an uphill battle!)
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Favorite bits;
"The silence was total. Even the crickets outside stopped chirping."
"Oh, God, please don't fire me."
"Please don't hate me," whispered Stephen, but by then Jon was too far gone to hear. (you make me really care for "Stephen"--an uphill battle!)