ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Epilogue: Whom Anchors Guard And Pundits Sing
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Heavy stuff. And, y'know, sex.
Words: ~3000
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: This story has been a blast to write, and the feedback has been incredible. Thank you all for reading, commenting, encouraging, enjoying, and taking a chance on mpreg in the first place.

Here, at last, it comes to a close. Enjoy.

Clips referenced: Stephen and Steve's arrangement.

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Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 20: Boy, "George"
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~4300
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: I was almost tempted to write, in the middle of this chapter, "...50,000! I've hit 50,000! Take that, Hyperion! I bet you thought I'd never finish! Now pay up!"

I didn't, of course. I'm not that cruel.

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Meetings and reunions, decisions, revelations, confessions, and very possibly a few happy endings. )
ptahrrific: Woman with a notebook (Default)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 19: What Goes Around...
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for mild ickiness
Words: ~3000
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: As mentioned on the previous chapter, here's the bill in question.

Clips referenced: Stephen's driver.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Our story comes full circle. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 18: Leader of the Nation
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~4600
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: More information on the vetoed stem cell bill can be found on NYTimes.com (requires free registration), on ScienceDaily.com, and in the Library of Congress legislative record.

Clips referenced: A little respect; Vice President of the Nation.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




For Stephen, getting an invitation to appear with the President is a dream come true; to make it happen, he'll surpass all expectations. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 17: Plan B-H
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Warnings: Innuendo, fantasies
Words: ~4100
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: As the story approaches its end, the chapters are getting longer. And with this one, it's broken the 40,000-word barrier. This is officially a novel, folks.

If you got teary at the last chapter, keep those tissues handy.

Clips referenced: Stephen's Korean arch-nemesis; this is a God Machine.

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Stephen Better Knows one of his doctors, rescues the God Machine, and comes to a profound realization. He's like an action hero, except that he spends most of the chapter lying down. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 16: In Jon We Trust
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: More of the offscreen tumbling; real wife action
Words: ~3200
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Okay, so it wasn't actually Jon's wife in that first clip on TDS; it was production assistant Gina Brown. But let's pretend.

Clips referenced: Jon and his wife watch TV; Pellicano voicemails (NFZ has transcripts).

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Jon's wife appears on the show and gets brought fully up-to-date; some shady business in Stephen's past comes to light. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 15: Backstory in Black
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Cursing, references to shady sexual situations
Words: ~2800
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: To properly write Lewis Black would require a lot more swearing than this chapter pulls off. As you read this, please mentally insert F-bombs to make up for the shortage.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Lewis yells at Jon a lot, and in the process some history is revealed. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 14: Jolly Good Show
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for offstage, um, "tumbling"
Words: ~1900
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Clips referenced: The Queen's visit; Tony Blair's departure.

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John Oliver accidentally puts himself in the line of fire, and Jon retaliates; the other correspondents are horrified to find how far he'll go. Mmm, drama. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 13: The Cruelest Month
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Warnings: Pain, suffering. Mostly on Tad's part.
Words: ~2900
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: The title, and the summary, are from the first verses of "The Wasteland", because I am a nerd.

Clips referenced: The toss; the disastrous Eagle Festival; Jane Fonda; the metaphor-off.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




April is the cruelest month, breeding / Giant heads out of the new set, mixing / Memory and desire, stirring / Dull interviews with springy Jane. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 12: You've Got To Kick A Little
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Words: ~1900
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: I'm always up for concrit. This chapter in particular benefited greatly from a comment by [profile] gaiafaye on the last one.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Stephen and Jon are still adjusting to their new post-fight dynamic. Jon, meanwhile, is starting to notice what other people think of it. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 11: Staff, Shorted
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G
Words: ~2400
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: This opens by flashing further back than this story has yet — the original clip is here. (Part of it was used in the trailer.)

Other clips referenced: Fruit Juice, part one and part two; Bobby in costume.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Four years ago, Stephen was still Stephen. Even when pregnant, he hasn't changed, much to the dismay of his long-suffering employees Meg, Tad, and Bobby. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 10: The Doctor Is In
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG
Warnings: Mild swearing, mild ickiness
Words: ~3900
Three this time! )

Notes: Dr. Moreau's granddaughter is named after her. If you ever watched The Magic School Bus, you've seen her in action. (This has no bearing on the story; it's just amusing.)

Clips referenced: House-buying advice; Lent. The short referenced in the Moment of Zen can be found here.

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A routine checkup turns into a bit of a confessional, and Dr. Moreau finally makes her Daily Show debut. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 9: And This Time There Were No Moustaches Involved
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Words: ~1800
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Information about prehensile tails and Dr. Marco Pensworthy can of course be found in John Hodgman's book, The Areas Of My Expertise.

Clips referenced: Jon is sick; Ishmael Beah; Jon is mean.

You can watch the original February 14 toss here.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Jon tries to prepare a suitable apology. Nothing could have prepared him for the result. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 8: Fortune Favors The Ballsy
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G for this part
Words: ~1700
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: In the Reportverse, Stephen and Jon have radically different ideologies, so Stewart-Colbert '08 (or, for that matter, Colbert-Stewart '08) is not a popular T-shirt.

Clips referenced: Tragic local story; eight-child policy.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




If it isn't one thing, it's another. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 7: Calls of the Worried
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G for this part
Words: ~1900
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Rather than use the names of Colbert-the-actor's kids, Stephen's kids in-story are based on the ones he's named in various segments. More details here.

Clips referenced: It's not a date or anything; fall in love all over again; adult diapers; Bobby's replacement.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




In the present, worried kids call Jon. In the past, a worried Jon calls Dr. Moreau. Either way, a lot of worrying occurs. How much of it is justified? )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 6: The Sins Of The Papa
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG-13 for this part
Warnings: Language, sensuality, Bill O'Reilly
Words: ~2300
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: For the purposes of this fic, Stephen was O'Reilly's guest on Friday (the 19th) rather than Thursday (the 18th, also when Bill appeared on the Report).

Clips referenced: Bill O; Stephen's past 'professional' names; the aftermath.

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A story breaks about the biological parents of Stephen's child. Then, Stephen has a historic meeting of the minds (or rather, meeting of the balls) with a parental figure of his own. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 5: Do You Hear What I Hear?
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G for this part
Words: ~1700
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Hold on to that premature Christmas spirit, because it's the big day itself. (The Star Wars holiday special has not officially been released on DVD, and with good reason.)

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Stephen starts his Christmas all alone, except for a three-month-old embryo. Things can't get much worse, so they start getting better. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 4: The Hopes And Fears Of All The Years
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Warnings: Lots of alcohol.
Words: ~2000
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: As Stephen's pregnancy began in October, the story has now hit December. Put on some carols, break out the red-and-green napkins that gather dust in your cupboard eleven months of the year, and get into the holiday Christmas spirit. (Alternatively, you could pull out the RENT soundtrack; the musical takes place largely on Christmas Eve, and it's where I got Joanne, who makes a brief cameo here.)

Clips referenced: The all-star guitar-off; helium balloon drop.

Stephen's wife's name was given as Lorraine here. Her maiden name is taken from the actor's wife.

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The Decemberists showdown culminates in a jam so triumphant that things can only go downhill from there — and they do. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 3: Don't Panic
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Warnings: Discussion of various naughty bits.
Words: ~2500
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: Except for the original Wørd "Expecting" (which was shifted a few weeks earlier for the sake of continuity), all of the segments referred to actually occur on the given date. When Wørd or an interview is made up for story purposes, the material surrounding it and leading into it hasn't been changed.

Clips referenced: Jon's ringtone; Stephen's number; the final Colbert County segment.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




Stephen has his first off-air freak-out. On air, he is calm, stoic, and informative — mostly. )
ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Title: Expecting, Chapter 2: Midterm, Midtacular
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: PG for this part
Warnings: Language, mild ickiness.
Words: ~1700
Disclaimers, one in poem form )

Notes: A couple of things to remember about the Reportverse (the one in which Stephen is a real egomaniac and TDS is a real news show):

All the shows are live, rather than being taped earlier in the day. This pretense can be seen in the real shows; for instance, in the 6/6/06 episode, Jon opens with "in less than an hour we will have averted the apocalypse."

Clips referenced: Midterm Midtacular toss, ending.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




In the early weeks of the pregnancy, the people around Stephen try to adjust, while dealing with the chaos of the midterm elections. )

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ptahrrific: Woman with a notebook (Default)
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