ptahrrific: Jon and Stephen, "Believe in the me who believes in you" (fake news)
Erin Ptah ([personal profile] ptahrrific) wrote2010-05-13 12:11 am

Fake News/House, M.D. - House Rules

Title: House Rules
Series: TDS/TCR; House, M.D.
Characters/Pairings: Jon, Dr. House
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Work of parody. Not real; not mine.

One of the extra fics written for last year's Merry Month of May. For [personal profile] wwanda, who wanted Stephen to meet House, with an explanation of why he has a picture of House displayed on his set.

(I thought I was going to come up with more of this, but, well, since it hasn't happened at this point, I figured I should at least post what there is.)

House Rules

"Don't go in."

"Hey, hang on a second!" exclaimed Jon, as the celebrated Dr. House brushed past him without so much as a glance. For a guy using a cane, he moved surprisingly fast. "What's wrong? Why can't I see him? Does he have some kind of horrible isolating complication?"

"Yes!" snapped House over his shoulder. "It's called being asleep!"

"So he's okay?" stammered Jon hopefully.

The doctor hesitated, then turned around and limped back to him, eyes narrowed. "How are you two related, again?"

"I'm, uh, his friend."

"Friend," repeated House. He made the word sound rough and gritty, like it had been stretched on a rack to make sure it wasn't up to any funny business. "I see. Then maybe you can tell me: Is he normally this chatty?"

Uh-oh. "He can be a little high-maintenance, yeah," admitted Jon, now just hoping the sleep was perfectly natural and not the result of something slipped into Stephen's drink to get him to shut up. "Has he been yelling at you?"

"No, he's been..." House's mouth gave an odd twist, as if it weren't quite used to forming these particular shapes. "Happy."

Jon frowned. "Don't you normally make patients happy?"

"I make them better," corrected House. "Being Mr. Bedside Manner is not part of the deal. But from the way this guy acts, you'd think I was oozing with charisma."

"That's Stephen for you," said Jon wryly. "If he thinks you're on his side, he adores you unconditionally."

"Ah. So he's an idiot."

"Hey now," protested Jon. "He may be an idiot, but he's my idiot. Listen, before he gets out of here, give him an autographed photo or something. You'll make his week."

[personal profile] randomfandom10 2010-05-13 04:26 am (UTC)(link)
As always, you read my mind. Specifically, all the awesome subconscious bits! :D

After this week, I started rewriting my Jon and Stephen and Hosue crossover too!
lotesse: (panopticon)

[personal profile] lotesse 2010-05-13 02:55 pm (UTC)(link)
YOU WROTE IT! The boyf. and I just watched that episode yesterday afternoon, and we looked at each other and said somebody has to make fic out of this. AND YOU DID. AND IT WAS AWESOME. INFINITE TINY HEARTS.

[personal profile] inspirine 2010-05-13 10:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm surprised it took Stephen a long time to mention the pic on his show.

This was a nice ficlet.
wwanda: (Default)

[personal profile] wwanda 2010-05-16 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)
What a lovely surprise to see this again! It sure brought a smile to my face this morning. :D Thank you!